hardofhearingchildren.com by PAM Candlish MLS
"What did you say?" "Eh?" "WHAT did you say?" "MM?" "WHAT DID YOU SAY?" oh "PARDON ME!"

Finding Talk Time

Time for Speech and Listening in the Family

This summer I have been thinking about time in the hard of hearing child's life. Minutes count up into hours, and days and weeks. Reid is turning 18 this month, and I figured out that I provided auditory/verbal therapy to him, one-on-one for 17,000 hours, and we did not start auditory/verbal until he was three.

We did not have a FM at home until two years ago. I have a boom mike and we have some interesting uses, especially for driving the car. I also know that without the FM, he never heard a word I said in the car.

Traditionally the FM was used only at school, and only for the deafer children. But kids are at home for more hours than they are at school, and there are weekends and holidays. 

Potential Cracks to Slip in Listening and Talking

This little chart indicates sleep time in aqua, potential speech time in yellow and school time in red, out time and TV time which involve saying where the child is going or what the child would like to watch, is a little extra sneaky speech work too, in green. All those hours add up, in the long run.

Tired Children

A tired child is a grumpy child. Grumpy children are much harder to get along with, need more encouragement and placating, and are unreasonable about their perceived needs. Grumpy children have finished learning for the day.

As a stay at home mom. by 7 pm I had had enough of my children, and started bathes and stories for bed. Today's parents often are working until later, have traffic etc, and don't want to hassle the child for the brief time you have together. This ultimately means the children watch more and more TV, later and later, or play on a computer, both possibly very informative activities, but one thing I know is that children learn best in real time experiencing the world first hand when they are not tired.

Bed-time at 8 on School Nights

Also read in ivillage parent news that learning disabilities are aggravated by a lack of sleep, and certainly hard of hearing children frequently are so tired at school that academic subjects are placed in the morning. So making plans for this year, how about more sleep and less TV.

We had staggered bedtimes from  7.15, 7:30, 7.45, 8.00. In half-day programs, many children are bushed after lunch, in pre-school, kindergarten, and in grade one, having to go to school all day is again exhausting.

Play Outside After School 

I think children should regain the habit of going outside to play after school. If you have a rotten neighbourhood, then make a cooperative play group at a park sharing the guarding responsibilities, but get the kids off their fannies. Mostly what I see when I drive around are huge middle class neighbourhoods with very nice gardens and no evidence of children, yet there are lots of kids in the schools, so there are kids but they are inside the houses probably watching TV or using the computer. 

Children are Active Naturally, and Need Fresh Air

Children sit still too much at school. Most of the children I know are very active as pre-schoolers, and some learn to sit still, be quiet, take orders as part of a group in kindergarten. I was shocked to see so little gym at school. I had gym daily throughout my schooling until university, and soccer after school. My children could choose  gym in high school, but it is not a required course. Also I think children should go outside at recess and breath fresh air. If the air is not fresh, then do something about the air quality. We had a school board order in Montreal that all the school windows were opened by the teacher for 10 minutes in the morning and 10 minutes in the afternoon regardless of the weather. This was to refresh the school room air. 

 The children are getting collectively fatter and fatter which heads to diabetes...so if the family is headed to the golden arches for supper- great speech opportunity ordering dinner, they should have a good run  or fly a kite or have a bike ride or...first. Better for their lungs too, which makes better speech. If the family is not heading out, then everyone should pitch in about making supper, which is usually well within earshot around a table or counter, and talk as you go.

Food and Family

Supper is the best time of the day. The parents must model politeness, manners, sharing, serving the others first to each other and the family. My husband's family was very heavy-handed at the "Reduce the child to tears," especially after he failed a grade. Consequently he tended to be too fierce at the dinner table. I think the human family and digestive system flourish in as little tension as possible. Supper, eating together comfortably are very important. This then becomes the forum for discussion, argument, testing, planning and the strength of a family.

Homework, BAH.

I have not planned for homework because I think homework is punishment. I would far rather see a child read books, and participate in the family than do more school-work. They have already enough school time. I think the school should send home a form the first day of school which gives a choice. "I support homework and will enforce it." or  "I choose to not support homework for this child." My children who had ease of written English did their homework on the bus. My children who had troubles with school work, had just as much trouble with homework, had to look up every word written and wasted an hour or two of my day in arguments about homework. Usually children are tired after school, so what is homework really doing for them, they are not learning, especially if they have any handicaps. I also think the teachers punished my children who were less than brilliant with more homework than the other kids got...same teachers, different kids, different homework.

Many Children have Too Many Activities

If your life seems to be spent in the car taking kids to many activities, have the child choose which activity is the most important to him or her, and do one activity. If you a really smart you will suggest an activity which is in your neighbourhood and have the child walk there. The only really great thing about ferrying children in cars is that the child is locked in a seat belt, and has another opportunity to listen and talk.

-PAM Candlish 2 September 2002

Time Management for Students

CHOICES is an interactive classroom seminar that gives middle and high school students a chance to see into the future and recognize the importance of the personal and academic decisions they make today. Self-discipline is encouraged as the key to success in their future endeavors and at the end of the seminar they are given the "Key to Success" as a reminder of the control they have over their choices and their futures.
This a very interesting approach to the issues of choices of time management for students. As long as we remember that kids cannot be pushed to perform all the time.
http://www.choices.org/index.html

PAM Candlish April 2006